How to Stop Feeling Lonely at School

High school is full of changes—new classes, shifting friendships, and figuring out where you fit in. These changes can make you feel disconnected but also give you chances to grow. 

In this guide, you’ll learn why loneliness happens and how to work through it. You’ll find simple tips to build real connections and boost your confidence.

Key Takeaways

• Understand your feelings and why they occur.
• Join clubs or activities to meet new people.
• Build meaningful relationships with supportive friends.
• Seek help from trusted adults like teachers or counselors.
• Use technology for positive and safe connections.
• Take care of your health with rest, nutrition, and exercise.
• Focus on small wins and stay positive.

Why Do Students Feel Lonely at School?

Loneliness is when you feel disconnected or isolated, even if others surround you, and it’s normal to feel this way sometimes. It is about feeling like you don’t belong or that your relationships aren’t meaningful. Many students in high school experience this, and it can be hard to deal with.

There are several reasons why you might feel lonely in high school:

• Starting in a new environment: Moving to a new school or beginning high school can feel overwhelming. Adjusting to new surroundings and classmates takes time and can leave you feeling out of place.
• Figuring out who you are: High school is when you start discovering who you are. If you feel unsure about yourself or worry about how others see you, it can make connecting with people harder.
• Dealing with social pressure: There’s often pressure to fit in or be accepted by a group. If you don’t meet those expectations, it can make you feel left out or excluded.
• Friendship changes: As you grow, your interests and priorities may change. This can cause old friendships to fade and make it harder to build new ones, leaving you feeling isolated.
• Stress from schoolwork: Balancing homework, activities, and personal time can be overwhelming. You may feel too busy or stressed to focus on forming deeper connections.

A CDC survey found that 40% of high school students reported feeling persistent sadness or hopelessness. This often ties to feelings of being alone.

Ways to Connect with Other Students

Finding friends in high school can make you feel less lonely. Joining clubs and activities can make your school years better. It also helps you make friends that last a lifetime. Here are some ways to make friends in high school.

Joining Groups and Activities You Enjoy

Being part of clubs and activities you like lets you meet people who share your passion. You might find:

• Sports teams encourage teamwork and collaboration.
• Music bands or choirs foster creativity and connection through shared passion.
• Art clubs provide a platform for self-expression while connecting with a group of friends.
• Volunteer groups allow you to give back to the community while forming strong bonds.

These groups help you feel like you belong. They also help you make friends based on what you both like.

Simple Tips for Starting Conversations

Starting a conversation can be scary, but it gets easier with practice. Most people are happy to talk if someone starts first. Here are some simple tips to help you begin:

1. Ask open questions: Try questions like, “What’s your favorite class?” or “How was your weekend?” These encourage longer answers.
2. Mention shared interests: Bring up things you have in common. For example, “I saw you at the art club. What do you like to draw?”
3. Give compliments: A kind word like, “I like your jacket!” or “Your presentation was great!” can start a friendly chat.
4. Be curious: Show interest in what they say. People enjoy feeling heard.
5. Use what’s around you: Talk about something relevant, like, “That test was tricky. What did you think?”

Using these tips can change how you connect with others. It helps you feel more confident in talking to people. This can lead to deeper friendships, a better high school experience, and help you cope with feelings of loneliness.

Getting Help from Adults You Trust

Trusted adults, like teachers, counselors, or parents, can help you deal with loneliness. They are there to listen, offer advice, and support you. Talking to them can make a big difference. 

Talking to a Teacher or School Counselor

Teachers and school counselors want to see you succeed, both in school and in life. They can guide you and connect you with helpful resources if you’re feeling lonely. They might suggest activities or clubs where you can meet new people and make friends.

When you talk to a teacher or counselor:

• Be open about how you’re feeling.
• Share specific struggles, like having a hard time making friends.
• Ask for ideas to improve your social connections.

The American School Counselor Association recommends one counselor for every 250 students. Unfortunately, some schools don’t meet this standard. If your counselor isn’t available, talking to a teacher can still be a great option to cope with feelings of loneliness. Teachers understand the school environment and can offer helpful suggestions.

How Parents Can Be Supportive

Parents or guardians are often your biggest supporters. They might not know exactly how you’re feeling unless you tell them, but opening up can help them understand and guide you.

Here’s how parents can help:

• Listen without judging: Let them know you need someone to hear you out, not solve everything right away.
• Encourage conversations: Share your feelings and what’s bothering you. It can feel hard at first, but it helps.
• Explore solutions together: Parents can suggest new activities or ways to meet people who share interests.

Growing Your Confidence and Social Skills

Building self-esteem and developing social skills are key to feeling less lonely in high school. Being confident in school helps you connect better with friends. Try activities that mimic real-life social situations, like role-playing. This way, you can practice different interactions safely and feel more sure of yourself.

Setting small, reachable social goals is a good idea. For example, try to talk to someone new each week or join a new club. These steps help improve your social skills. Also, practice positive self-talk. Overcoming negative thoughts helps you feel more positive and ready for social situations.

Discovering Hobbies That Make You Happy

A hobby is any activity you enjoy doing in your free time. It could be painting, playing a sport, cooking, or even solving puzzles. Hobbies help you relax, express yourself, and explore new interests. They can also help you meet new people, feel less alone, and get to know more about yourself.

How Hobbies Help You Meet New People

Hobbies bring people together who share similar interests. When you join a group, club, or class for your hobby, you’re surrounded by others who like the same things. This makes it easier to start conversations and build friendships.

For example, joining a soccer team or taking an art class gives you opportunities to connect with others. You can bond over shared experiences and work together. Students who participate in group activities are often happier and less lonely.

Using Technology to Stay Connected

Technology makes it easy to stay in touch with others. You can chat with friends, meet new people, and stay updated with what’s happening around you. But it’s important to use technology wisely and safely.

Meeting Friends Online Safely

The internet is full of ways to meet people who share your interests. You can join gaming groups, hobby forums, or online communities. Platforms like Discord, Reddit, or apps for specific interests are great places to connect.

To stay safe while meeting people online, you should:

• Keep your information private: Don’t share personal details like your address, school, or phone number.
• Be careful about meeting in person: If you decide to meet, choose a public place and let someone you trust know.
• Trust your feelings: If someone makes you uncomfortable, stop talking to them and report their behavior.

A recent study found that 57% of teens have made close friends online. This shows that online spaces can be a great way to connect as long as you stay safe.

Making the Most of Social Media

Social media helps you stay connected with friends and meet people with similar interests. Apps like Instagram, TikTok, and Snapchat let you share, create, and interact in fun ways.

To use social media in a positive way, you should:

• Follow positive accounts: Choose accounts that inspire you and match your interests.
• Stay connected: Comment on posts, share fun content, or message friends to keep in touch.
• Join groups: Use hashtags or join groups on platforms like Facebook to find others who share your hobbies.

Tips for Staying Positive Throughout High School

High school can be tough, but staying positive can make it easier. A positive mindset helps you handle stress, build confidence, and enjoy your experience. While bad days happen, there are simple ways to focus on the good and keep going.

1. Celebrate small wins: Notice small successes, like finishing homework or trying something new. These moments build your confidence and keep you motivated.
2. Be around supportive people: Spend time with friends, family, or teachers who encourage you. Positive relationships can lift your mood and keep you on track.
3. Practice gratitude: Write down three things you’re thankful for each day. This simple habit improves your mindset and reduces stress.
4. Set simple goals: Break big tasks into smaller steps. For example, focus on one assignment at a time. This keeps you organized and less overwhelmed.
5. Take care of your health: Get enough sleep, eat healthy meals, and stay active. These habits improve both your mood and energy levels.
6. Limit negativity: Stay away from people or things that make you feel bad. If social media is upsetting, take a break or unfollow accounts that bring you down.

Resources for Mental Health Support in the USA

If you’re struggling with loneliness or mental health challenges, there are reliable resources available to help:

• 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline: Call or text 988 for free, confidential support 24/7.
• SAMHSA National Helpline: Call 1-800-662-HELP (4357) for assistance with mental health or substance use issues.
• Crisis Text Line: Text HOME to 741741 to connect with a trained counselor anytime.
• MentalHealth.gov: A government resource with information and tools for mental health support.
• Youth.gov: Visit for resources tailored to teens and young adults.

These services are here to support you, no matter what you’re facing. Don’t hesitate to reach out for help.

Conclusion

Feeling lonely in high school can be hard, but it’s something you can overcome. Start by understanding why you feel this way and take small steps to reach out to others. Join activities you enjoy, explore hobbies, and talk to trusted adults who can support you. 

Use technology to stay connected and focus on building friendships that make you feel appreciated. You can create a high school experience that feels happy and meaningful with patience and effort. 

About College Journey

Feeling lonely in high school can make the thought of college seem even more overwhelming, but you don’t have to navigate it alone. College Journey is here to support you every step of the way. 

With Alice, your AI-powered college counselor, you’ll receive clear, step-by-step guidance to help you understand how colleges evaluate your GPA, test scores, extracurriculars, and essays.

Alice also helps you see how your unique experiences and qualities can make your application stand out. Whether it’s advice on strengthening your activities, writing an impactful personal statement, or simply staying on track with deadlines, College Journey has the tools you need to succeed.

College prep doesn’t have to be stressful. With personalized recommendations, school comparisons, and progress-tracking tools, College Journey simplifies the process. Best of all, it’s completely free to sign up.

FAQ

How can I build my confidence in high school?

Start by focusing on your strengths and celebrating small achievements. Try stepping out of your comfort zone with small challenges, like joining a club or speaking up in class.

What should I do if I feel left out in a group?

It’s okay to feel this way sometimes. Try finding common ground with one or two people in the group and start a conversation. Building individual connections can make group settings feel less intimidating.

How do I handle rejection when trying to make friends?

Rejection can be tough, but it’s a normal part of life. Focus on people who appreciate you and look for others who share your interests. Remember, not every connection will click, and that’s okay.

How can I improve my communication skills to connect better with others?

Practice active listening, ask open-ended questions, and show genuine interest in what others say. Being approachable and positive can help people feel more comfortable talking to you.

How do I deal with loneliness outside of school?

Consider joining local community activities, sports teams, or volunteering programs. These can help you meet people outside of school and broaden your social circle.